More Top 4 Dumbarse Kijiji Free ads - Ask ABE

Some people like to go to Yuk Yuks for a laugh. Myself, I like to browse the Kijiji free ads. Only in these ads will you find reality TV mixed with comedy.

Exhibit 1

"Free comfy and clean couch. From a pet and smoke free house. Pick up at south side".

That is one small couch!

While some ads may display an ignorance as to what an inanimate object is termed, others ... come across as whimsically creepy. What the heck do you make of this?

Exhibit 2.

"mannequins, looking for, fully body plastic"

"I'm looking for full bodies mannequins to conduct an experiment with pigeons in my balcony"


Exhibit 3

This one ... "Wanted: Looking for a mini doberman", but ... it's a cat?!

Lets zoom up on that for a closer look at this sought after Doberman Pinscher Dog:

Yep, it's still a cat!

Exhibit 4.

And rounding off my Top 4 list is an interaction I had with one of these interesting personalities. I posted something on Kijiji to sell. I wanted to move it quickly and was asking $5 for a $100 item, which was still absolutely new and in a sealed package. As he's driving to my place, he messages me, "do you take etransfer?". 

No, it's only 5 dollars. I want cash.

From which he replies:

"Sorry, I just can't pull out 5$ so I'll pass. Sorry".

I have to admit, his reply is a bit dumbfounding to me, lol. He seemed put out, almost indignant. Apparently paying 5 dollars with a 5 dollar bill is too large a hurdle for him to jump over. 

I follow up with a question, "Is this a millennial thing where cash is antiquated? Or is this a covid thing and you're afraid to touch money?"

And true to form, he answers with a non-answer, "I think it's both". Now if it's covidphobia ... he's still coming to my house and buying my merchandise. So this would be inconsistent and a tad stupid, akin to the way an NDPer might process information.

Whatever it is, this is conclusive proof that Easterners have moved to Alberta. 

Or maybe I'm just crazy, Honest Abe.